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Jul 17

Ndoko and Nboki Episode 1

NDOKO AND NBOKI: LONG LIFE

 

Nboki: Wake up!

 

Ndoko: Hmm………!!!!

 

Nboki: Stop twisting and turning and wake up

 

Ndoko: Ooooh! You have come again! What is it this time?

 

Nboki: I have been thinking.

 

Ndoko: That is your problem; you are always thinking. If you are not thinking of why is the sky blue, you are thinking of why the fish doesn’t have wings or what you can do to never shit again! So what is it this time?

 

Nboki: I want to live very long and grow old but I am scared.

 

Ndoko: What? You woke me up to tell me that!!??

 

Nboki: It is important o! I have been pondering this for long now. I am petrified of living long.

 

Ndoko: Why?! Why are you scared?

 

Nboki: Look at Mama Jose! I went to visit her last week and she couldn’t even recognise me! I had to scream before she heard any thing I was saying.

 

Ndoko: Really?

 

Nboki: Yes! I didn’t enjoy her attempt at a smile at all! It was a gory sight. All her teeth are gone. Absolutely no dentition!

 

Ndoko: Na wa o!

 

Nboki: To crown it all, she spends almost half of the day talking to imaginary friends who sometimes by the way she fights with! She actually punches people we cannot see! What of Pa Mabugo!

 

Ndoko: What about him?

 

Nboki: You know he married very late in life?

 

Ndoko: Yes. She is a very beautiful one. His wait was not in vain. The man has a good eye!

 

Nboki: Well, he now has a broken heart as well!

 

Ndoko: What do you mean?

 

Nboki: The woman has run away with one young hunk of a guy.

 

Ndoko: It’s a lie!

 

Nboki: Have I lied to you before?

 

Ndoko: Why now? Why did she leave him?

 

Nboki: She complained of “no service”

Ndoko: What does that mean?

 

Nboki: Baba could not perform! Old Johnny will not cooperate.

 

Ndoko: Old Johnny? Who is that?

 

Nboki: Oh Ndoko! Stop winding me! You know what I am talking about. Fire dey the woman body and Baba could not quench it!

 

Ndoko: Ok. Ok, just pause. Now what has all these got to do with you?

 

Nboki: A lot o! I don’t want to experience all that at all at all. I can’t imagine being a burden or problem to any body.

 

Ndoko: Don’t worry you wont have to be.

 

Nboki: Why do you say that?

 

Ndoko: If you continue the way you are going, you will be dead in maximum 10 years time!

 

Ndoko: YEEEE! That was painful o! Why did you pinch me?

 

Nboki: Which kind of rubbish talk is that?

 

Ndoko: It is true now! Do you think worrying, moaning, and not sleeping can add one minute to your life? That will rather even cut short your time!!!

 

Nboki: You have a point there!

 

Ndoko: Of course I do! A wise man has said no one can add one cubit to his life by worrying.

 

Nboki: Go on.

 

Ndoko: Listen, as for me, I am going to grow old and I plan to enjoy my old age. In fact I am sure I will!

 

Nboki: How do you plan to do that?

 

Ndoko: Nboki, it is 2 a.m. One of the things I am doing to achieve that is making sure I sleep well. I think we should continue this discussion tomorrow. Please let’s sleep.

 

Nboki: But me I can’t sleep now! In fact I have hardly been sleeping 3 hours for the past 1 month

 

Ndoko: You know I said tens years before. Reduce it to five

 

Nboki: What!!!!

 

Ndoko: Yee! He wants to kill me o………

 

Those are my two friends. Hope you enjoyed their chat as much as I enjoyed writing it. Till next time, stay joyous.

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